Showing posts with label For Fun. Show all posts
Showing posts with label For Fun. Show all posts

Thursday, September 30, 2010

AND HERE'S THE PITCH!


This weekend I attended the annual SCBWI Carolinas Fall Conference. I learned lots of amazing things and came away with a head full of new knowledge and a muse loaded with ideas. But there is one thing that has been nagging at me and I thought I’d like to share.

The amazingly talented marketing guru and writer, Shelli Johannes-Wells hosted a workshop Sunday morning called DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE M WORD. It was a very insightful lesson on the ins and outs of branding for authors. One thing she said that stuck with me was, “Know your pitch!” She said most people tend to zone out after the first ten words!

Wow, really? It got me thinking about the pitch for my novel, BLOOD TIES. This is my next “big” work. This is the piece of heart and soul that I hope to catch an agent with. And until Sunday, I wasn’t worried about my pitch. I had it. It was done. Heck you may have read it here on my blog. It was short (45 words), it was simple and to the point. So what was the problem? It didn’t seem natural. Shelli said your pitch should simply start like this: “My book is about. . .”

Instead, mine was more formal. It read much like a book flap or query letter. Take a gander:

His Dad is in jail, his mother is an alcoholic and his little brother is a pint-sized Goth freak. Life isn’t easy for Talon Cooley,
so when Dad calls from prison looking for another hand-out to save his worthless life, what's a guy to do?

Not bad. I mean, it didn’t suck and you got the gist. My problem was that it didn’t flow easily in conversation. If someone says to me, “So, what’s your book about?” I will look like a total dork if I suddenly turn on my James Earl Jones narrator voice and spout the above pitch. So I decided to make it more personal, more easily accessible and likely to hold up in conversation. Here’s my attempt:

My book is about . . . a teenage boy stuck in the shadow of his father’s jailhouse rep. So when neighborhood pets start
disappearing and an arson roams the area, fingers automatically point toward “that Cooey boy.” Talon’s struggle to clear
his name initiates a risky game with a dangerous drug dealer and leads to a discovery that just might give him a new outlook
on the man he calls Dad.

Whew! It went from 45 to 72 words. I’ve heard a pitch should never go above 150-200 words and I’ve managed to stay below that. Although it would never fit on Twitter. Does it still need work? Hell yeah. But my novel is still a work in progress and I’m thinking I might have a better handle on it once it is complete. In the meantime, It’ll still be rolling around my brain looking for improvement.

Now let’s talk about you. How’s your pitch? Is it formal like mine or can you tell me about it in casual conversation? Do you know it by heart? Will it fit on Twitter? (There are agents/editors who sometimes take pitches there and also sponsor contests.)

Let’s see what you’ve got. Pretend I’m Joan Q. Editor. We’re together at a social gathering and I look at you point blank and say, “So, what’s your book about?”

Share your best pitch in the comments section below.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

MARLEY & ME - AN ESSAY CONTEST



I recently went to see the movie, MARLEY & ME, based on the NYT Bestselling book by author John Grogan. Admittedly, I have not yet read the book and although I knew the story was about a naughty dog, I assumed it would be a comedic piece. Therefore, I was very surprised at the depth of emotion the movie evoked in me and everyone else who wept openly in the theatre. I had no idea it would end the way it did.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with MARLEY & ME, it is a memoir of sorts which chronicles the life of one young couple as they embark on their life together and the building of a family; beginning of course, with the addition of a puppy. From the beginning Marley is an incorrigible animal and his hijinks do make for great humor. Although this rough and tumble canine is billed as the world’s worst dog, he manages to forge an unbreakable bond within the Grogan clan. Through good times and bad, Marley is always there. Until Father Time begins to take his toll and a decision must be made regarding the dog’s fate.

On this day, I sat in the theatre and watched John Grogan’s hauntingly familiar story play out on the screen. Amazingly, it was very much like my own and struck too close to home. In the final scenes, as Owen Wilson held and comforted his dying dog, I saw myself, doing the same thing almost exactly a year ago.

So, as a tribute to my faithful friend, Seven, and as a writing exercise with a therapeutic upside, I thought I’d like to post my essay, SEVEN & I. For those of you who are or ever have been dog owners, I’m sure you have an unlimited supply of your own brand of canine comedy. In tribute to man’s best friend, and as a simple writing practice, I ask you to post and share your fondest, funniest memories here. In fact, I'll even offer a $10.00 Books-a-Million gift card for the best one. I will choose a winner on Tuesday, January 27th, so post your submission soon! Here's mine:

SEVEN & I

I paid a $3.00 filing fee for a three-month-old stray. Had I known how badly behaved she would be, I might have left her to the Dog Officer. Upon arriving home with this yet-to-be-named imp, I opened the back door.

“Welcome to your new home,” I announced.

She promptly jumped on our new couch and threw up. Of course I felt bad for her. Poor little baby got car sick. No problem. I took her outside and tied her to the porch rail while I cleaned the mess.

Task finished, I hurried to bring her back inside. But she had other ideas. Instead of finding a puppy on my back porch, I found a brand new leash dangling from the rail, clearly bitten through by needle-sharp puppy teeth. Now what? How does one call a puppy with no name? Turns out I didn’t have to call her, she was easy to find. The house across the street raised chickens and at that very moment a considerable racket emanated from their hen house.

I found the newest member of my family happily chasing terrorized chickens haphazardly around the neighbor's yard. I desperately tried to rein in the little trouble-maker, while the chicken-lovers watched, but she was too fast and was having the time of her life! With feathers flying and gobs of chicken scat stuck to my shoes, I finally managed to grab her when she snatched up a poultry treat. Needless to say, I had saved the dog from certain euthenization, but was unable to save the chicken from the dog. So, with great apologies to my neighbor, I pried the deceased fowl from the puppy's stubborn grip and dragged her home.

Potty training was no easier. She refused to pee on paper and relieved herself whenever and wherever the mood hit. It wasn’t long before my perfectly kept home smelled like a rest room at McDonalds. Putting her outside for bathroom duties was a trial in itself. If there was a way to wiggle free from her tethers, she would be gone in a flash. Although we had finally given her a name, Seven, she still refused to acknowledge it and only returned home when she was good and ready.

We lived deep in the country back then and Seven took an affinity to the local wildlife, often bringing them home as trophies. Squirrels were her number one target and she usually managed to smuggle their dead carcasses into the house without our knowledge. One fine evening I found her tossing an opossum around the yard. When my husband picked up the lifeless creature to remove it from the yard, it curled it’s worm-like tail around his finger and gave a toothy grin. Hence the term, playing possum. But Seven’s biggest catch was the 3-point buck she herded from the woods, which very nearly struck me down. To this day, I’m not sure who was more surprised, me or Rudolph, as he charged out of the brush and I dove out of his way.

All in all, Seven remained an important and loyal member of our family for fifteen years. She was there for the births of our children. She stayed with us through our move to North Carolina and kept us safe while my husband was away. She comforted me through my miscarriages and always remained our ever-watchful protector. Her loyalty was second to none. A miserable puppy had grown to be an amazing dog. I finally made the decision to put her down when she was so stricken with arthritis that each day became a furious battle. When she looked at me with those beautiful brown eyes, devoid of their impish glow, she seemed to beg for help. I held her close and whispered of our love and devotion as Seven took her final breath, her body fully relaxed for the first time in months. She is sorely missed.

-Niki Schoenfeldt

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

HAS ANYONE READ "TWILIGHT"?


Now that I've finished all the "required" reading of my booklist from www.curledup.com, I have decided to do a little of my own “for fun” reading before my next round of review books is delivered. I have heard the buzz and found myself mesmerized by the simple cover designs of the much talked about TWILIGHT series by author Stephanie Meyer. I began the first book Sunday night and have been struggling to keep my nose out of it ever since. Needless to say, my house is a mess and my children are in dire need of some attention. I'm not sure what it is about this book that has piqued my interest so intensely, but I must admit, I'm hooked.

I am surprised it has grabbed me as thoroughly as it has as I’m not a big vampire fan. Not to say I hate vampire stories. I don’t. But I do believe they’ve been done to death. And yet, Stepanie Meyer’s young adult series seems to have some invisible force over me that I can’t put my finger on. What makes hers different from everyone else’s and why the big phenomenon? I’m not sure. Maybe I’ll have a better grasp of it when I finish the first installment. At this point, all I can say for sure is the book has great “voice”. Written in first person from the main character’s point of view, Ms. Meyer has nearly convinced me vampires are alive and well and living in cloudy locales! Although I’m not one to shrink in the dark or wear a garlic necklace, this book brings with it an amazing feel of authenticity. This is what I think makes it so outstanding. It leaves me, the reader, thinking about the characters long after I’ve put the book down. (Which ultimately causes me to pick it up again.)

Often, when a book is as highly regarded as this, my expectations become considerably elevated and I usually end up disappointed. However, here I am halfway through book one and I've yet to experience any sense of letdown. Both Meyer’s main characters (Bella & Edward) are amazingly appealing individuals. Each has their own attractive personality and the chemistry flowing between them is incredibly fascinating and nail-bitingly enticing at the same time. So much so that I am chomping at the bit to begin book two, NEW MOON, and I’ve yet to finish book one. I will stop at the grocery store, the drug store, any store I can find on short notice and buy book two as soon as I leave my house so I will have it readily available when I finally turn the last page of TWILIGHT.

I’d love to know what opinions the rest of you who’ve read it have gathered. Are you as spellbound as I? If so, why? What do you think makes TWILIGHT different from other vampire stories? What is its pull and why has it gripped the consciousness of nearly every teenage girl I know? What is it that Stephanie Meyers has stumbled into and where can the rest of us get some?

-Niki Schoenfeldt

Friday, November 14, 2008

CONTEST WINNER ANNOUNCED


Thank you all for entering. I was hoping for a bigger turnout, but hey, it wasn't bad for my first blog give-away. And of course, I can always count on those fabulous Mudskippers for their support.


Okay, now for the moment you've all been waiting for. The winner of The Fractured Keyboard's 1st contest giveaway is. . .


Drumroll please!


Beth!!!!!!


Here is her winning submission:


You know you're a children's writer when you think J.K. Rowling might have used too many -ly adverbs!


Beth has won herself a complimentary, autographed copy of the wonderful new picture book, NATURE'S LULLABY. (I'm a little bias. I know the author.) Which can be purchased by clicking on the link to the right, or on Amazon.com.


And speaking of -ly adverbs, keep checking back for an upcoming article on that very issue.


Thanks again for playing!


Thursday, November 6, 2008

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A CHILDREN'S WRITER WHEN. . . A CONTEST


In the style of Jeff Foxworthy's famous REDNECK series of jokes, I thought it would be fun to add our own Children's Writer's version to the mix. I'd like each of you to stop and think of a funny but true situation you found yourself in (at least in terms of your writer's imagination) and finish the following line:

You know you're a children's writer when. . .
Post it by Thursday, the 13th and on Friday, the 14th, I'll pick the one I think is the funniest. The winner will receive a complimentary copy of my book, NATURE'S LULLABY. However, there is a catch. If you win it, you've got to review it on Amazon. (Okay, a bit shamless, but hey, whatever works!)
Now get to it. Here's mine:
You know you're a children's writer when you find yourself thinking up vivid color descriptions for your son's bloody nose.